Greener pastures or the green eyed monster?

I guess it is rather flattering to be envied. I guess im sometimes too idealistic in the sense that i think vices like jealousy and envy are abstract feelings that exist in the war of good and evil in fables and fairytales but woe betide me i've just come to the realization that this isn't true. It's been repeatedly splashing and clawing at my face...so many little nuances and examples that build up to make this giant, perfect tapestry screaming green monster green monster at me. But repeatedly i've denied it and refused to learn the skills expounded and spawned by Darwin's stupundoficious theory ostentatiously named " the survival of the fittest theory". What a load of bullshit. I mean its like saying "Hey we're animals. We need to honour our basest instincts. For our material survival without which our existence would be meaningless, it is justified to use every tool whether ethical or unethical, humane or inhumane, moral or immoral, good or bad as a means to an end."

So out goes values like humility,modesty and acceptance of one's own weaknesses and in comes(rudely shoving in, stepping on collective humanity's soul)aggressive, testosterone charged values like confidence and arrogance with no strings attached. Where things like bashing other people's self image to up yours a notch is seen as a norm and even encouraged and those who protest seen as weaklings, weirdos, misfits because they do not agree with the prevailing status quo of humanity's messed up psyche.

Maybe Im too idealistic. Maybe im too sensitive according to most people's standards but if being aware of things-like being receptive to others' feelings,dignity,humility,modesty and hurting when "good friends" stab you in the back because of the green eyed monster that you had no active hand in creating,is seen as a by product of over sensitive paranoia, then i do not want to belong to such a society. Because these values are what makes us different from the dog taking a crap on the roadside. Because these values are what makes us different from the cigar puffing, unscruplous conman waiting for his next hapless victim. Because these values are what makes us different from the diva in a room full of white lilies yelling orders to have every inch of the room revamped with red roses just because...

I'm not saying im perfect or that ive been free from jealousy or envy but at least i accept that its not right to leave it festering unchecked in one's mind. And i nip it in the bud. So far ive been able to do that. Because i think " Hey whatever that he/she excels in way better than me is his/her God given right and talent. So instead of despising it we should admire it because it is a manifestation of the Creator's omnipotency rather than hating it and regarding it as a magnification of one's own inadequacy in that aspect". I know there are times when i falter and its difficult to keep abreast of the jealousy but how could i ignore something that is so fundamental and true???

And remember what happened to Julius Caesar? He got too powerful(according to his peers) so he was killed and they hid behind a sly shroud of having done a service to Roman society by ridding it of a soon to be tyrant(which wasn't even proved). I think that if more people were aware of their station in life and held on to it firmly no matter how much more another person shines than them, they wouldn't feel so intimidated,inadequate(and therefore feel a need to put down that person) or scared because you know that you already have a very important and unique part to play in the fabric of time and the universe, just like every star that makes up the evening sky.


I LOVE THESE QUOTES:

Never waste jealousy on a real man: it is the imaginary man that supplants us all in the long run. ~George Bernard Shaw


Envy is the art of counting the other fellow's blessings instead of your own. ~Harold Coffin


Jealousy is simply and clearly the fear that you do not have value. Jealousy scans for evidence to prove the point - that others will be preferred and rewarded more than you. There is only one alternative - self-value. If you cannot love yourself, you will not believe that you are loved. You will always think it's a mistake or luck. Take your eyes off others and turn the scanner within. Find the seeds of your jealousy, clear the old voices and experiences. Put all the energy into building your personal and emotional security. Then you will be the one others envy, and you can remember the pain and reach out to them. ~Jennifer James


If envy were a fever, all the world would be ill. ~Danish Proverb


Envy slays itself by its own arrows. ~Author Unknown

Revisiting Roots

Usually I don't care much for the Burmese Entertainment Industry. I think it's shoddy,lame and very much outdated but there is one Burmese Beauty whose timeless grace has floored me. Here she is!
Her name is Eindra Kyaw Zin...She's so lithe and beautiful. Without trying too hard.

High Fashion & Abstract in Motion

Audrey Hepburn: Timeless Beauty

She's my timeless fashion icon. The epitome of a classic lady. From her demeanor right down to the gentle, creasing laugh lines and her twinkling eyes thrill with accents of gracefulness. And it's not forced. It's an innate thing.

Bubbles and cyanide: a paradox?

I wish to go back to the days when a bubble blown with care free thoughts glistened in the sun and made my day. I yearn for the days when I never failed to be enraptured by the dewy beauty of roses. I envision past days of listless lying on the sofa and thinking how big everything around me is. And being excited when a familiar, beloved face made loving noises and coo-ed my name...I wish i was a child again. No one can ever perceive the world through a child's eyes. It strips the hypocrisy, pain, falsehoods, dogma and unnecessary complexities...it lays the world bare, an artist's impression of the reality as it is without prejudice-true to its primal existence.

This bareness is exhilarating, breath taking,like shards of truth slicing hard into flesh yet the child's dimensions allow only receptory sensations akin to the soft purr of velvet against skin. Truth and clarity are fresh faced visitors welcomed with tiny embracing arms smudged with crayons and mud. Peace is a permanent resident, requiring no visas, taxes or any of those tiresome government documents to verify it's content lodging in the sunny dell of mirth. Curiosity is at its peak;it fledges its magnificent wings and is soon airborne amidst fluffy white clouds and a slowly shuffling seascape of cotton waves and silver sand dunes. Nothing ever lost its spark, a frog pond, a ribbon wrapped over an ancestor's memorabilia of love gone but not lost, a brown paper bag with a bulging peanut butter and jelly sandwich sealed off with mom's kisses. It does not feel the pain so addictive in the adult's world where narcissism and self hate go hand in hand, justified into daily human norm by Freud and others.

The harsh ambiance of the stark adult's world has no time or patience for the child's world. If the child's world and the adult's world were to collide, the adult's world would shrink in hostility into a brooding black hole, a cornered mangy dog starved of love, beaten and trampled on to fulfill the manifestation of its name. Yet it would remain, a gaping wound on the gradients of innocence and happiness yet to be tainted with materialism. I can imagine the wound throbbing and thrashing like a speared eel awaiting its sombre death on a spit fire. Soon the mists of confusion would seep out, a cyanide genocide of every child's Once-upon-a-time....

Beauty OR the Beast

Beauty is a many faceted thing...Sometimes I think beauty is a two sided coin, a two headed snake. Beautiful people seem to have it all; the eyes and heart of the opposite sex, salespeople rushing to your every need, always getting the extra half inch of everything. Why? Simply because they are beautiful-a slice of heaven, a flagrant display rather haughty even with well meaning intentions. Beauty invades the space and makes people sit up and notice. It is an ephemeral thing winking its multi faceted eyes at you on 4 inch built in stilettos.

What with today's gluttonous consumerism glorifying physical beauty which has become an enigma, a much sought after quality that gives you the edge in the endless human rat race towards getting the most of everything. TV adds prostitute beauty in bottles of Chanel perfume and "Get at the nearest store" denim "cut to flatter figure and bring out its beauty". Some of this inane hogwash even cross into hypocritical territory by claiming that Beauty is what comes within whilst turning to the next page, the fantabulous flotsam ends by implying raw beauty, the inner beauty is available at every woman's fingertips as long as she buys their product, which they claim is NOT a product but an extension of oneself, how one portrays oneself to the whole world- would you run away from the stage when a smooth as peanut butter performance is being promised you, handed over on a velvet cushion by uniformed servants?

Sometimes I think of beautiful people, those famous flawless stars from Hollywood and even the pretty girl next door that escapes a speeding ticket merely by blinking those heavy batted lashes throwing the unsuspecting officer off guard, causing the brain to fire a thousand neurons giving stupendous excuses for letting "the poor lass" off...You get my point. "Friends" suck up to beautiful people hanging around them like bees to honey because they get to grovel in the reflection of perfection, it rubs off some well worn glitter on them who could never look at a mirror without spotting a flaw. To such hangers-on, beauty is a lucid reality and anyone possessing it should be put on a pedestal. If they are lucky they might get a bit of the magic that's working for her wouldn't they?

When people think of frogs getting dissected in cold, ramshackle laboratories in high schools, most of them are plagued by feelings of revulsion and for the emphatic ones, sorrow and pity and finally refusal in the form of rebellion against the dissection. Whatever it is, it is not a pleasant sight-I mean beholding a pregnant frog get dissected over a lamp, the place dotted with lots of curious, appalled teenage observers and participants. Rapid gasping is ignored until the frog slowly dies...Then observations, measurements, comparisons and analyses are jotted down on unfeeling sheets of homework paper.

Call me mad but I actually see a striking (though disturbing similarity) between the life of those beautiful starlets and divas and the poor unfortunate frogs with their insides splayed out for study and "learning". The terrible scalpel of media frenzy and public intrusion invited by their glamour statuses rips apart the thin flesh of their lives in a cold, vertical line right down the middle. Some of those beautiful people, confused, branded it a mid life crisis. Others called it " Lack of privacy", yet others " intrusion", " pressure of the public eye"...You name it they give it different names but the concept that bears fruition to these names is the same as that of the unfortunate frog getting dissected in the laboratory. At first the frog revels in the strange, new, surroundings in tune with its heightened senses that all point towards its “specialness” because everybody seemed to be interested in it; everybody was apparently mesmerized by it. Yes, indeed it was special when the dissection starts on the anaesthesized frog akin to when the glaring globules of public interest swing full circle to the cleanly butchered pieces of their lives put on the shiny metal pedestal of public scrutiny for all to see.

When I think in terms of this, it really makes me wonder whether beauty really is a blessing or a bane...Us creatures in shallower waters know not that at high tide we shall be swept away. This happens every day but sadly the fallacy of human memory is apparent throughout the winding course of its turbulent history. Beauty is a many faceted thing: the truth is, the media portrays and exploits only one incomplete portion of it, the material version.