shabby blog

Friday, August 28, 2009

A ditty about 3rd year lecturers

Ok first off, I'll just have to scream into my cone of silence: what the heck is wrong with them hormonal 3rd year lecturers?? Fine maybe you wont see them sprouting fangs or turning a nasty shade of green signalling the hormonal attack( I kinda wish it did so then we'd have time to prepare perhaps?)but my third year lecturers, all of whom are co-incidentally female( hmm what does that say abt females and law?)are a tad too emotional to function normally in a classroom setting. Don't get me wrong, all of them are stellar lecturers and i'm grudgingly glad that at least women who seem passionate abt their job are teaching me but the mood meter imbalance thing kinda scares me because i dont know what to expect.

Take for example( i shall not name names since i do not want to meet a ghastly end), Lecturer A who is actually quite accomodating and warm and gasp*nice in her room but in the classroom, she is like this ghoul shrouded in mystery. She'll show slides of Vietnamese Orchids(wtf)then give us a conveniently vague assignment. Sealed with the audacity to tell us to "breathe and laugh and relax!" before coming to class. Sorry, but im a sadist and a cynic. Then she'll tell us she wants say, a circle and then the next day turn around and argue vehemently that all she's wanted was a square all along. She'd make incredulous remarks like "Sayang" before the actual launch of the hormonal weaponry.

Then take lecturer B who stormed out of the room because the presenters were taking some time getting ready. We waited like that for some time till she came back into class, a thunderstorm hanging over her head. And the class, yes pin drop silence. But then on the plus side, she really does hammer those who come late to class because she'll actually stop her lecture, give them a spine chilling glare and ask them deadly quietly what the time was. Before the student was done reflecting how she should answer the rhetorical question, several well aimed headshots would be flying her way grilling her about her unfortunate habit and ending with " I'll lock the door or ask you to get out the next time this happens". It would be better if she had shouted because you can see the potential fury and rage in the open but when someone speaks in a deadly quiet tone like that, you just never know how much of blackhole energy is waiting to explode inside. Makes for a good show though, as long as it's not me( i know right selfish bitch that i am but at least im honest).

After the hormonal ones, come the cool as cucumber, stick-to-the-book-as-if-your-life-depended-on-it-types. There's one lecturer, let's name her Mdm Tassaud. Now Madam Tassaud is like those bookish librarian types that follow things to the letter and wouldn't allow for an exception in human circumstances unless it were computed to her that she do it by a higher authority. She drones on in a monotonous, high pitched voice which strangely does not carry past the third row in the lecture theatre and changes slides at the speed of light. So can you blame me for doodling nonsensical nothings with my friend at the back of the class? Coz at the end of the class we have absolutely no idea what she's talking about.

And hey in our defense we tried, the first week, straining our ears out of our tudungs and taking down whatever words we caught( which in the end ended up looking like babblement anyways). If you miss a tutorial which hasn't even properly started, she'd want you to give a scroll extending to doomsday about why you weren't able to make it. "No submitting assignments after lectures!Only in cannot be helped if you can't for emergency purposes make it to the tutorial this friday". All that said with a sweet, concrete smile.

But then there are the nice hormonal ones...The one that's very warm and motherly and always has a smile hooked onto the ears. Then there's the cute, unassuming little lecturer that tends to skip her own classes but is really quite nice. Why can't they all be hormonal in a good way? Oh wait there's no such thing as hormonal in a good way. So scratch that...the nice ones aren't hormonal. They're just well NORMAL.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Zooey 101

I'm obsessed with Zooey Deschanel's new band, She & Him so don't be surprised if you see an overflow of her vids from you tube here. This one's my fav

She & Him-Sentimental Heart( Stuff im totally digging)

Friday, August 14, 2009

New Soul

Somehow strangely this illustration reminds me of Yael Naim's " New Soul":

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit about how to give and take.
But since I came here
Felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake


I'm a young soul in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake.
But why all this hate?
Try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make.


This is a happy end
Cause' you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong

This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take your far away.

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit about how to give and take
But since I came here
Felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake



Tuesday, August 11, 2009



Poem by Dr. Maya Angelou

I note the obvious differences
in the human family.
Some of us are serious,
some thrive on comedy.

Some declare their lives are lived
as true profundity,
and others claim they really live
the real reality.

The variety of our skin tones
can confuse, bemuse, delight,
brown and pink and beige and purple,
tan and blue and white.

I've sailed upon the seven seas
and stopped in every land.
I've seen the wonders of the world,
not yet one common man.

I know ten thousand women
called Jane and Mary Jane,
but I've not seen any two
who really were the same.

Mirror twins are different
although their features jibe,
and lovers think quite different thoughts
while lying side by side.

We love and lose in China,
we weep on England's moors,
and laugh and moan in Guinea,
and thrive on Spanish shores.

We seek success in Finland,
are born and die in Maine.
In minor ways we differ,
in major we're the same.

I note the obvious differences
between each sort and type,
but we are more alike, my friends
than we are unalike.

We are more alike, my friends,
than we are unalike.

We are more alike, my friends,
than we are unalike.

Monday, August 10, 2009


I love being by myself
I love having a messy room and the tiny but momentous feeling of accomplishment once i clean it up
I love being flawed in ways that can be improved upon
I'm excited by the fact that we are all dying slowly each day since the moment we were born
To move onto unsought of worlds
I love having the emotional spectrum of a male peacock's tail and surprising myself
I love the dynamics of people politics
I love going to an afternoon class which is suddenly cancelled
I love happy tree friends and laughing at the gory parts of SAW( all of them)
I love people I'm blessed to love

If you have a problem with that, go F*** yourself.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Another timely rant

I'm a very expressive person. I have a lot of love to give. Its the same with hate. Im a fiery ball of emotional energy. But just because i magnify every emotion a thousand fold and feel for the equivalent of a thousand people, with a thousand tears and a thousand joyous rainbows in my heart...i cannot expect others to be like me. Maybe others are like planets orbiting quietly in stark contrast to the burning sun...they dont emote that much and they dont feel as much. It is a problem for me because everything i feel i feel it deeply. When i love someone i love that person so deeply, ill place that person on a lofty pedestal and love him/her with a love so fierce that you couldnt find it even if you combed the ends of this universe and over again.

This is the love i feel for my family, especially my parents who are EVERYTHING to me and who SACRIFICED so much to make me the person i am today. God knows how fucked up i would have been if i didn't have such uniquely loving and caring parents. Which is why I am yet to dedicate a portion of this fierce love to a guy...I really cannot find anyone worth bestowing such love on and say whatever u want, id rather die single than waste my love on an insipid fool who does not have an inkling of appreciation for the love im capable of giving. Im like a loyal little puppy and i would gladly die a thousand deaths for that person...I expect so much from people. I see the world through rose tinted glasses, a romanticized world view of things that should be.

Sadly reality is a bitch and when im expecting a thick, creamy cup of freshly brewed Brazillian coffee, i get slapped in the face with a slosh of cold, diluted, cheap, roadside coffee made with fatty infused condensed milk and low quality dishware.

Dear God

Cold hands grip my throat, twist it into stiff sinews
I know not what may come
But i know i definitely am not expecting the worst
This cannot be happening

Dear God please spare my father
He's everything to me
Do not make him a casualty of the dastardly swine flu
He doesn't have a shred of evil in him
He's so good he'll put the angels to shame

Dear God please please if there has to be casualty, call me selfish, call me evil
But it certainly cannot be him
He will not be reduced to a mere statistical blot in an insignificant report
This can't be happening.
It cannot be what i think it is

Dear God spare my dad
I have to have hope that he'll get well
That the worst won't happen
Take me if you want but not him
Id die a million times over for him

Saturday, August 1, 2009

God of Chaos

This month has been a chaotic month for me,peaking with alarm bells ringing when dad was a suspected h1n1(swine flu) case. Drove me crazy with worry. And the man rarely makes a fuss when he's sick and this time he quarantined himself completely in his room letting no one in. So that got me worried. But thank God he's safe now. AT least the basic test for h1n1 proved negative even though the actual Throat Swab test isn't ready yet till next week. All in all I'm hopeful. But having lovely friends to buffer your fall and depression everytime a rogue wave hits is definitely helpful. To the others " Those who matter dont mind and those who mind dont matter". Love that saying.
Anyways ciao~